Nothing is DUMBER than this

Dumb thing #1. Ax brought in the mail. In the mail was a Christmas card from our neighbor that had been mailed with a 37 cent stamp, delivered via the US Postal Service. This neighbor, Teresa, lives about 30 feet from my back door. Is that not the dumbest thing ever?! I would've thought that she'd have taken the personal delivery opportunity to stalk Ax and corner him with news of her newest beau.
Dumb thing #2. Ax has been sick the past few days. He has a cough, sinus thing going on. He acts like a mega whiny baby, but that's beside the point. He gets up at all hours of the night, repeatedly to cough and hack and spit and blow his honker. He sounds like a friggin' elephant. He got up last night and went into the living room and proceeded to watch TV with the sound up too loud. The boom boom of the base kept me awake. The really dumb thing happened when Ax decided that he was going to get on the internet. We have the horrible dial-up. Ax couldn't get the phone to work so he came into the bedroom at around 4 am to wake me up and ask me why the phone wouldn't work. Alrighty, that does it. That is the dumbest thing EVER. As I'm lying there with sugar plums dancing in my dreams what the heck makes you think I have a clue about what's going on with the stupid phone line?!! We've had problems with it before and I've called the phone company. But does this give me some enlightenment regarding our po-dunk country, hick phone line?!! NO, NO, NO!! Don't wake me up for this. As a matter of fact don't wake me up unless someone is dying. That's right... Dying, About to expire, Croak, Meet their maker, Travel to the other side...you get the picture!!