Guinness Book of World Records: The World's Largest Splinter

Ax and I bought some furniture this weekend. We are making an effort to streamline. A computer armoire to clean up lots of junk. A bookcase...I have never seen two people in more need of a bookcase that did not own one. Needless to say the thing is already completely filled up.

We purchased the furniture on Saturday morning and carted it home. The task of light sanding and staining then commenced. I wore a mask and sported it oh so sexily.

I then proceeded to have the WORLD'S LARGEST SPLINTER become lodged in my right thumb. I almost passed out when Ax began to poke at it with a razor blade. I almost died when he got the tweezers. He finally removed the five inch long torturer (okay maybe half inch, but whose measuring?). I bled horribly. Well, maybe just a drop or two...But it was horrible.

Now my thumb hurts. And I'm looking for my recognition from those Guinness people.