Lawsuits, Lies, and Weddings

My cousin EB is getting married for the 3rd time on June 3rd. Funny, huh?
My mother has said that she will not attend the wedding due to receiving her invitaition a week later than everyone else. Why, you ask did she receiver her invitation late? Welllll....let me tell you a little story.
The reason for the late invitation: The Shouting Match
Once upon a time.... (okay this ain't no fairy tale). Anyway, EB rented my youngest brother's house from him while he and his wife and kids were living with my parents due to some immaturity, financial, and drug use problems. While EB lived in their house she totally trashed it. It's been said that the house was left in a disgusting state of filth. Past visits to visit EB never revealed such filth. However it may that visits were scheduled. It may be that she purposely left the house that way out of spite. EB is known to be over emotional and dramatic. At one point she had desired to purchase the house. She called in her realtor and then some questionable and dishonesty transpired. EB then stopped paying her rent. Foreclosure notices were sent to the house and EB would promptly dispose of them. It must be noted that my brother is certainly an irresponsible party in this mess. But due to the cluster of idiots involved it got to the point that attorneys were included and my mom had to pull cash off of credit cards to come up with $3,000 in order to prevent foreclosure. My mother then proceeded to collect repayment by means of half from brother and half from EB. Lawsuits, threats and lies then ensued. The situation came to a point of resolution for a while.
The ugliness reared its head again when EB was moving out of the house and my brother was moving back in. White trashiness and yelling happened in the front yard. Unfortunately my dad was in the middle of it. He said some stupid things to EB that he shouldn't have. His anger was justified but his temper got out of hand. The next thing we knew EB had left the property however her big ugly fiance came looking for my dad. Thankfully they never met up. It must be noted that my money would have totally been on my dad. Dynamite comes in small packages. Not to mention that war related anxiety mixed in with a little craziness makes for a short fuse.

So I received my wedding invitation from EB. My mom did not receive hers. I called EB to politely inquire. Obviously my mom did absolutely nothing to EB and I am entirely removed from the situation. EB gave some bullshit line about not having my mom's address. Lie, lie, LIE. But she said she'd put it in the mail that day so I just let it go. My goal was to mend fences. A week went by and mom didn't receive the invitation. I confessed to having called EB and proceeded to discuss with my mom how there was no way in hell I'd attend if EB didn't invite mom too. Mom was disgusted over it and admitted that she would have attended had EB invited her.

Well guess what finally came in the mail?!

Guess who says she's going to pout and not go because she got the invite a week late??

Here is the e-mail between mom and I:

Mom says: I got EB's invitation yesterday (Thursday) but the only reason she sent me one is because you called her so I'm going to be stubborn and still not go.

Jenni says: Dammit. Now you're just being unreasonable.
Don't punish me for being honest with you and telling you I called her. The entire purpose of my call was to avoid hurt feelings and family gaps. You are throwing good intentions and honesty in my face. Please reconsider. You and I can go together. We'll leave the boys at home. We will have fun. Come on now, please.

So far, no response from her.

Exhaustion

I am so tired! I have no idea why. I wish I had gone to be earlier last night but I don't know if that would really help. I'm stuck here at work and I desperately want to take a nap. WHY, WHY, WHY!!! I feel as though I should stay when leaving is what I want to do so badly. My eyelids are drooping and I'm miserable.

So what if I stink....my house smells great.

This weekend Ax and I attended his parents 38th anniversary celebration. It was a barbecue hosted by Ax's brother, Brad.
Brad's wife, M, had cleaned all day. She is known for being compulsive about the state of her home. She despises unplanned visitors because of this quirk of hers. The funny thing is that her house was very clean, however she looked as though she hadn't showered or seen a cosmetic in 48 hours. I find this amusing. I happen to be quite the opposite in this department. While the state of my home is important, my personal appearance is of farrrrrr more concern. Especially when I'm having guests over. This quirk of M's, amuses me further because of the image that seems to be so important for them to uphold......"so what if I stink, my house smells great." Hahaaaaaaa.
The other event of the evening that I found distasteful occurred between Ax's parents. It's obvious in their day to day interaction and conversation that the two do not really like each other. However James surprised Wanda with a lovely gift. He picked out a gorgeous ring for her. She was delighted.
Two oddities must be noted.
If I were a member of a strange cult that only allowed me to celebrate one day a year, being in recognition of my anniversary, I would make it a very magnificent celebration and commence the exchange of expensive gifts with my spouse. Not the case here. Wanda responded with the appropriate "oooohs and ahhhhs" upon receiving her gift. Then she proceeded to admit that she "had not got him anything, only a hard time." No kidding sister. We have all been witnesses to that. She further admitted that she wouldn't get him anything, all he would be able to do is spend more money on his hobby of building a Model T.
What a witch.
Outside of these observations the evening was very enjoyable. Ax's family is just weird.
Not to say that mine isn't. His is just more subtle about it. Which makes that much more fascinating in my view.

Perpetual Bliss

I am dragging Ax to a Baby Fair tomorrow. I am looking forward to seeing the booths and attending the lectures.
We are also attending a barbecue in celebration of Ax's mom and dad's anniversary. It's being held at Ax's brother's house. We are very rarely invited over to Brad's house. Seems they promote an image of being very well off and far too busy to associate with mediocre people such as ourselves. We've also got the impression that they work hard to impress other members of their church (a very cliquish Church of Christ). It's possible that Ax and I don't quite fit that mold. I know it bothers Ax that his brother basically ignores him. Brad doesn't return phone calls or e-mails. It's very heartless of him. I think this will be the second time we've been invited to their house in the past year. We attempt to invite them to our house only to receive non-committal answers of whether or not they can attend. If they do attend, they are consistently at least one hour late.

Why the heck did I get off on that tangent?!

Back to the point. There shall be bliss in gathering together to celebrate a good thing. There is bliss in good food. There is bliss in attending baby related functions (just because I say so). There is bliss in NOT having to come to work for two whole days!

22 Weeks

My body is stretching and growing. I feel my stomach hardening and getting heavier. There are times when it's a bit uncomfortable. I also despise the bathroom scale these days. I know I'm supposed to get fatter. It's just hard to smile at the numbers getting higher when I've fought them my whole life. Buuuuutttttt...I'm dealing. It's certainly not keeping me from eating, eating, eating. The appetite is ravenous and can not be ignored.

Thoughts of impending life changes are making me nervous. The current need for sleep is undeniable. The idea of having to adjust to life with no sleep seems frightening. However life with my little baby seems as though it will be joyful. Maybe not every minute of it, but most of it.

We've cleaned out the nursery, as the yard sale was a success. I had to say goodbye to my lovely cherry desk. I hope the couple that bought it will enjoy it.
The color we've picked out is a light, mint green color. It looks like a peaceful, neutral color to me. It will be easy to decorate around.

Nursery Furniture

Mother said she'd buy my nursery furniture when I told her I was pregnant. She told me to pick out what I wanted. Seems simple enough, right? Not so.
We picked out 4 pieces totaling $1,045 from JCPenney's. Very reasonable considering that my mothers taste is very expensive. Ax and I are making an effort to lessen the burden on her.
Then we received good news for my mother. Ax's parents will buy half the furniture. So that's around $600 for each set of parents. Though we neglected to figure in taxes and shipping, Ax and I may have to contribute some ourselves. My mother was delighted to hear that they'd be helping.
That was 2 months ago.
We still haven't received my mother's portion of the money.
Ax's parents are sitting on quite a fortune, so money is no issue for them.
Mother continues to make excuse after excuse about why she will have it 2 more weeks. Always two more weeks.
While we realize that we have until September, we'd like to have the nursery completed before the end of August.
It could easily take at least a month for the furniture to arrive.
Assembly could take a while as well.
Saturday night my mother came over to my house. Some how talk of the nursery came up. She seemed kind of disgusted with the topic of her portion of the nursery furniture money. We have NOT abused the topic. I understand that a gift is a gift. I refuse to be demanding or ungrateful. I know she needs time. I'll be patient. I understand that $600 is a lot of money. I just wonder, what predicament would we be in if Ax's parents hadn't offered to buy half the furniture? It seems we might have never been able to get it. I just don't understand what's up with my mother. She's never let me down my entire life. I know she'll come through now when I need her to keep her promises the most. It's just all frustrating.

Mother's Day

I love my mother dearly, don't get me wrong. I should be writing a post about how generous she is. I'll do that a little later. Right now I must vent my frustrations at her love of all things material.
Ax and I are on a budget. We're trying desperately to get some debts out of the way before September.
My middle brother Jonathon has just started a job and gets his first 1/2 a paycheck this Friday.
My youngest brother Jeff has a mortgage and three kids.
My mother wants us each to pitch in $75 to buy her a new standing jewelry box and expects dinner out and flowers. She deserves every bit of that and more.
It's just that right now it's a strain.
But how can I say no? I can't say no and I won't.
I have to think that this time next year may be even harder for me. However I know it's hard for my younger brothers now but they will have to bear the burden regardless.

I will not do this to my children. I'll ask for their company and that's it. Anything else they give will be of their own desire, not of my request or demand.

A Hormonal Mess

I suppose it's the hormones. I hope I can blame the hormones.
I was feeling rather on edge this morning. Usually Ax can be a bit snippy and it doesn't bother me. He's just a butthead sometimes. I forgive him and typically over look it. Today he was just really upsetting me. He apologized before I left for work. I thought everything would be okay.
And then...
On my way to work I was pulled over by a GA State Trooper. I was running late and let the hammer down, so to speak. I flew past him and then saw his brake lights as he was turning around to come after me. I had my blinker on to turn off the road before he even put his blue lights on. I knew he was going to pull me over. I'd already had a super crappy morning. I kind of started crying a little. It was embarrassing. He only gave me a warning. When he walked away the damn broke. I started bawling like a baby. I cried all the way to work. I was 10 minutes late and my make up was/is totally screwed.

I need some chocolate.

Guinness Book of World Records: The World's Largest Splinter

Ax and I bought some furniture this weekend. We are making an effort to streamline. A computer armoire to clean up lots of junk. A bookcase...I have never seen two people in more need of a bookcase that did not own one. Needless to say the thing is already completely filled up.

We purchased the furniture on Saturday morning and carted it home. The task of light sanding and staining then commenced. I wore a mask and sported it oh so sexily.

I then proceeded to have the WORLD'S LARGEST SPLINTER become lodged in my right thumb. I almost passed out when Ax began to poke at it with a razor blade. I almost died when he got the tweezers. He finally removed the five inch long torturer (okay maybe half inch, but whose measuring?). I bled horribly. Well, maybe just a drop or two...But it was horrible.

Now my thumb hurts. And I'm looking for my recognition from those Guinness people.

IT'S A BOY

Ax and I went to the ultrasound and saw the baby. We're excited beyond words!! Ax is thrilled and he's called everyone he knows. It's fascinating and frightening all at once. Now we'll really have to settle on a name. I've also got to step up my prayers to God. The baby is forming and growing so miraculously. Please God, let it all be put in the right place...inside and out. I pray that he be healthy, intelligent, and beautiful. God has been so good to me. I know He hears my prayers. I'd say this has to be the most important one of all.

If I weren't such a dummy I'd find a way to post ultrasound pictures. Not that they really show much. The tech was really nice and showed us everything. However to the average observer it's difficult to make out. But she was confident that it's a boy. She took a picture of the face and the little winkie.

I'm just in shock. We're having a boy!!!

Maybe My Little Brother's First Memory.... for Birdie

A MONSTER IN THE TOILET
When I was a kid we lived in a crappy part of town, okay it was the white ghetto. I was around 7 years old and my cousin, EB, lived with us at the time. My youngest brother, Jeff, woke up late one night to go tinkle. He would've been around 3 at the time. The house was dark and quiet. The little pip-squeak probably couldn't have reached the light switch anyway.
Suddenly he comes running out of the bathroom screaming like an ax murderer is chasing him. He was yelling that there was a monster in the toilet!
My cousin EB went to calm him and show him that there was nothing in the toilet.
EB started screaming.
My dad went in to check on them to see what in name of Mount Vesuvius was wrong.
My dad started screaming. ...(We're a bunch of screamers....umkay.)
There was a HUGE SEWER RAT IN THE TOILET.
**The story has been told and re-told many times in my family. To hear it told now, it would be said that the rat was doing the back stroke. It was also so huge that they could've thrown a saddle on it and ridden it out.**
The next part of the excitement, after my dad realized that there was indeed a monster in the toilet, consisted of him donning his army boots and attaching a large kitchen knife to a broom handle with duct tape. (Yep, we're hicks...you knew there'd be duct tape in this story somewhere.)
Maybe he had on his army helmet too. I don't know. It's certainly funny to picture though.
Daddy and EB went to war with the giant sewer rat. We could hear it screeching.
My mom kept us kids safe from the terrible monster. It was probably more like they couldn't have paid the woman millions to go anywhere near that toilet.

Admitting a Bit of Anxiety

On Thursday we find out if the baby is a boy or a girl. Ax has said all along he wants a boy. Whenever we talk about the baby he says, "It's a boy. I've put the stem on the apple." While this is a bit amusing, it's made me a bit anxious. I have always responded to him that it might be a girl. He's always sweet and says that'll be good too, but says he knows it's a boy. Well, I'm feeling some anxiety because of this. I would love a daughter. I would love a son too. I'd love to give Ax what he wants. It's just not up to me. This has put a slight bit of dread into me about Thursday. Is that awful? I want to know if it's a boy or girl. I will be joyful if the room is done in pink or shades of blue. (Yes we're stereotypical.) It's just Ax. I love him dearly. I guess there's a burden here. I have a desire to make him happy. I understand that it's a faux pas to admit this. It's just inside me and I can't ignore it. Ax means the world to me. I realize I'm not in control here. Life will go on regardless. It's just that it's clouded my sky some. Otherwise it will be a bright, happy day.